A few minutes from now, the curtains will brighten up because it’s about sunrise. I am still wide awake because I woke up at 10 in the evening last night. I just watched French Toast and jumped out of the bed after the movie. Opened my laptop and now I’m trying to write. I don’t know if I’ll ever get to post this. I had so many drafts that went to trash bin because I never got to finish them. Well anyway, I’m moving to Paris or Italy. Just kidding, but I hope it really happens. There’s something about Paris and Italy that makes me want to live there forever. I promise I’d try all the flavors of gelato.

If the books that I read and movies that I watch with Paris and Italy settings are signs that I’m moving there, I tell you, I would in a heartbeat. Lately, I’ve been watching really really old films. The oldest one is 1950’s – Roman Holiday. It’s a black and white film but I did love it. About a month ago, I binge-watched the movies where Audrey Hepburn starred. Adored that woman so much that I’m pretty sure I’ll have her photograph hung in one of the corners of my house someday.

It is Sunday today. I am torn between going back to sleep and start cleaning. Or painting. We’ll see. I have tried painting and it seemed like it’s not for me or maybe I just need more patience instead of giving up too early before I could finish one simple artwork.

Should I just cook breakfast now? Is it normal to crave for samgyupsal early in the morning? Am I normal? My stomach is rumbling. I should start preparing my food before my drowsiness takes over. Or laziness. Okay, BRB in 4 months?

So, I just used up all my brain cells for the week and my Monday shift hasn’t even started yet. I composed a whole document to be submitted later tonight. I was supposed to wrap it up last Friday, but then the procrastination queen inside of me prevailed. I hope my boss won’t get to read this or I shall pray for some good luck on my upcoming performance evaluation. I attempted to get it all done last Saturday but ended up sleeping all day. Hence, consumed all the left hours of my Sunday rest day cramming to finish it. Well, I did. Just about an hour ago. It’s currently 20 minutes after 6 in the morning. I haven’t slept yet since last night. My body clock is so fcked up every weekend.

Oh boy, I’m even planning to go out later to buy a mini sack of rice and spend an hour roaming around Watsons picking up Korean products in hopes that I’ll be at least half as pretty as those girls. They look like dolls, don’t they? I’ve heard people say not to buy K products as they’re not made for the weather we have in Philippines. Well, works on me. Sorry, friends. I guess my skin is made from Korea. Kidding aside.

I am thinking of what to eat for breakfast but I just devoured my Mendoko ramen leftover from dinner. I’ll probably get some sleep once I posted this. Then wake up before noon to go for a grocery run. Although there’s a 98.2% chance that ain’t happening. I want to be productive on my Monday morning to make up for the lost hours I devoted to sleep on weekends. Maybe I should finish the book I started reading. I’m stuck at chapter one.

Also, just want to brag that I cooked chicken tinola last week. It seemed like the first time I pulled off a decent viand. I was so proud of myself that I had it for two days in a row. I wish my family could’ve tasted it. They would never believe I cooked it because you know, I could barely turn on a stove. I never got the chance to spend time in the kitchen and prepare meals for the fam. Okay, I really had all the time to do that, but let’s just say I didn’t. Moreover, let’s forget the fact that I graduated with a bachelor’s degree in HRM.

Way back in college, my aunt asked me to slice hotdogs. I was so embarrassed because I didn’t know how to properly slice a hotdog. It was like rocket science for me. Every occasion, I always tried to offer some help in the kitchen but they keep me away from the stove and oven. My only contributions were peeling and slicing the veggies. And they even had to show me a sample on how to slice it or else, I would mince everything.

I also didn’t want to touch raw meat because it brings me back to the time when I held a kitten with bare hands, then I threw it right away because I could feel its skin and bones. I was so grossed out. Poor little thing. I’m so sorry, Lord. I was being punished for it because there was one time when my aunt asked me to rinse the ground meat she bought fresh from the market. I couldn’t say no to her. I was so horrified while rinsing it. I almost never touched it. If only it was my mother who asked me to do it, I would just run away and come back after 24 hours.  

My father always used to tell me when will they ever get to taste a dish I prepared. I just pretend I didn’t hear anything. I wonder how I passed my cooking subjects in school. I was always useless in the kitchen. I am only good at washing soiled dishes. But look at me now, my second favorite room in the house is the kitchen. Bedroom is always number one because sleep is life, lol.

Amazing how fast I can type my thoughts for a blog but took me two days to finish a document for work. I should write a book with a different story for each chapter since I easily shift topics. The readers would be confused of what’s the bottomline. I could imagine the reviews saying I am the worst writer ever. Guess I should just stick to blogging, huh. Got to hit the sack now.

I’d like to believe that this is all just a dream. One of those nightmares that go away once you drink a glass of water or get up and say a prayer. But no, it is damn real.

March 17, 2020 at 12:00 AM. Metro Manila was officially placed in quarantine. All public transportations were suspended. Companies sent their employees home early. Where was I? I was in the office working, thinking of ways on how I should go home. I have no private car and no family to pick me up at work. I thought I would just walk on my way home. Thankfully, my officemate offered to drop me off to the place where I live.

I never panicked. I did not even think of stocking up on food and other necessities immediately. It took a while for me to realize that the world has become different as the days went by. I was not even updated on how many cases were there already. It’s not that I did not care enough because I was not greatly affected by the circumstance, I just entrusted everything to the Lord.  

The weekend after quarantine was declared, I went to shop for groceries. I saw an old man as I was browsing through the toothpaste aisle. He was wearing a polo shirt that looked two sizes bigger than his. His slippers were muddy. No, I didn’t think he was gross. All I felt at that moment was guilt and pity. He was holding a basket with only a few items inside – a pack of bread, maybe 2 to 3 pieces of canned goods, and whatnots. Meanwhile, there I was, pushing one large cart full of items that some were not even useful for the next 6 months. When I was about to pay at the counter, I looked for the old man. I wanted him to get some more supplies and offer to pay it for him. But he was gone. I couldn’t find him anywhere. I kept thinking about him when I unpacked the groceries at home. I regret to miss the chance of being able to help even just a little. The thought of him bothered me for days and nights. I was thinking if the supplies he bought would even last for a week. The very least I could do was to pray for him.

Today is day 37 of quarantine. I haven’t gone out for more than a month now but I’m still sane. Although I have attempted to join the bandwagon and download TikTok. Then I realized I’m not ready to lose my reputation just yet. I’m kidding. TikTok warriors, I have nothing against you, lol.

I am used to isolating myself so keeping me quarantined makes no drastic change in my life. I still report to work on a night shift. Only that, I wear pajamas instead of office attire and sit on a dining chair with an iron board as my makeshift table. It’s pretty comfortable, can’t complain. But a La-Z-Boy would be perfection. Though I’m afraid I will be sleeping the entire shift because you know, once you sit on it you just don’t want to get up. Kidding aside. I know it’s not the time to wish for luxuries in life as we are facing crisis.

Anyhoo, how are you? There. In case no one has asked you how have you been. Wherever you are right now and whatever situation you are in, I hope you are doing just fine. I wish I am with my family right now. Tomorrow, I’ll be celebrating my birthday. They are supposed to be here today and spend a week of vacation but that’s no longer possible. I already canceled their flights and the accommodation that I have booked. I was planning for us to head to Baguio for a little sightseeing, stroll around the night market, and prolly have some fresh strawberries. My parents would enjoy the cold weather there. I also opted for a trip to Tagaytay if we couldn’t make it to Baguio. Papa loves a good bulalo and mama always wanted to visit Tagaytay. I was planning to show my brother the tech shops around Metro Manila. I was ready to go broke for a little while. I looked forward to spending some nights at Bonifacio High Street, drinking milk tea, snacking burgers and fries, listening to some local artists performing on the street, or just watching dogs (that most likely cost more than a month of my salary) walking around with their fur parents. But all of that is not happening anytime soon. Instead, I will be working my ass off on my birthday because I am so slammed at work these past few days. Again, not complaining. Probably just gonna prepare a good breakfast for myself and by good breakfast, I mean fried rice, scrambled eggs, danggit (salted dried fish), and milk on the side. Or maybe a hot chocomilk drink.

On days when I am not working, I binge-watch KDramas on Netflix, watch vlogs on YouTube, read some books, or spending hours on Pinterest. Some other days I am productive that I clean our whole place and do the laundry, but there are also those days when I am useless, lol.

I’ve been looking for ways to entertain myself as I can’t go out. I haven’t seen the sun and moon for a while now. Can’t even breathe the fresh air. Don’t know what day it is. A few days ago, I did a little artwork. I miss my art materials. If only I happened to be in Cebu right now, I wouldn’t be bored af. I could go on for days cutting papers, creating DIY projects, and painting my wall, I guess.

Recently, I found out about “The Chosen”. It’s an application allowing you to stream the series for free. Apparently, someone has paid for you to watch it and in return, you can also pay for other people to enjoy watching it for free. I’m still on episode 2 and I have not spent a single cent but I am just not sure if it would ask you to pay as you go on watching the rest of the episodes. It’s really interesting. Kind of similar to “The Passion of the Christ” but deeper. The story is about the life of Jesus. Highly recommend you to watch it and prepare a box of tissues.

This pandemic has given us the opportunity to spend more undivided time with our families and loved ones. So for those lucky people who are with their families right now, I hope you take advantage of the time to bond with each other while you can. Some could only wish they can do the same but are too far away.

To those who are in a NWNP (No Work, No Pay) situation and are running out of funds, may this pandemic be an eye-opener that we should have savings for we do not know what tomorrow may bring. There may be some people who would offer us help at the moment but we cannot always depend our survival on them.

To the frontliners who have been risking their lives every day to keep us safe, let’s also protect them with prayers.  

Now, as we are all hiding, the world is also healing. The skies are brighter, the waters are cleaner, the animals are happier. I cannot wait to go back to a normal life with fresher air and kinder people. Let us all take time to reflect that the worldly things like malls, clubs, restaurants, cars, and all that jazz are not essential as we are learning to live without them. They are just bonuses in life. The only thing that matters is our relationship with our families and friends, and our faith in the Lord. Lift everything up to Him and only Him. Keep believing that God is in control. This too, shall pass.

“Go, my people, enter your rooms and shut your doors behind you. Take cover, for in a little while the fury will be over.” – Isaiah 26:20

Two days ago, I forgot to pay my internet bill and for one moment, I was thankful I was so negligent of due dates. Hey, I’ve got to read books again. I realized being online almost 24/7 has forbid me to do the things I used to be so fond of. I wasted so many hours playing Candy Crush and adventure games on my phone, watching nonsense vlogs (although not all because I also watch home interior designing/ house renovation videos), and casually liking photoshopped photos on instagram by bloggers who appear to be perfect human beings and are living your dream life. Seriously, I should stop this social media addiction and actually start being productive. Can we count reading as productive, please?

I woke up at the crack of dawn on Tuesday and couldn’t get back to sleep. So I tried to play games on my phone to tire my eyes out only to keep me up all morning. I don’t really need to intake caffein to stay up for long hours. I pulled out my book and continued reading ‘The Wedding Diaries’ by Sam Binnie. It was hilarious and a little stressful but a good read. Rolled out of bed at 8. Prepared milk and instant carbonara just enough to stop the growling of my stomach. I was past half way through finishing the book when I suddenly felt sleepy at 10ish. I slept and woke up at almost 4pm. Oh God, please tell me I’m not going to die soon.

I had scrambled eggs for a very late lunch (almost dinner) and a cold rice. I was done with the book. Slightly impressed to myself, I read another one. This time it’s ‘I Heart New Yolk’ by Lindsey Kelk. It was so moving. I could just imagine myself being in NYC and staying there for good. Just like what Anglea Clark from the book did. Also, I desperately want a job like hers. Blogging about her NY adventures, dating hot guys (okay maybe I’m fine without men but if they’ve got black Amex and bring you to Tiffany’s, I’ll reconsider), and actually living her life. Isn’t that what we all wanted? I finished the book by lunch time yesterday and now I’m on my third. I’m half way through it and I just started this evening. There’s something about it that makes me read faster than ever and couldn’t wait to flip onto another page. Then I get sad when it’s over. It’s like watching a really, really good movie that you don’t want to end, but at the same time you badly want to hit the fast forward button to see how it really ends.

Oh God, I forgot how it feels good to finally get back into my reading habit. What have I been doing with my life lately? About five years ago, I could win an award for being the laziest, most boring, person in the world (or maybe just in our city or house). Actually, I still am. But I do get up every 8 years to go into the kitchen, get something to eat in the most inappropriate time. Who really said I could only eat on specific hours? Read again: please tell me I’m not going to die soon.

Five more days and I’ll be gone in here. I’m going to finally get some life. Please wish me the best of luck for whatever I’m gonna do in the next few days. I might also want to bring my series of ‘The Selection’ books to my trip. I’m on its third book and I never got to finish it since 2015. AJ bought me the set for only God knows how much. I have three other new books, still very sealed, also bought by him. I should read them all before he regrets buying me things I never even use. Then he regrets getting into a relationship where he has an ungrateful girlfriend. Then he breaks up with me. Then I write a book about it. Then I get famous and unhappy because I’m single, but also happy my dream has come true. Writing a book, not being single.

The past few days have been so rainy. If not, gloomy. Since AJ went back to MNL on the 7th, I never went somewhere far than my aunt’s house beside ours. Not even so sure whether I should pay my bill tomorrow to have my internet back again or wait until I finish this current book I’m into. Instagram and YouTube are such distractions. Should I uninstall them? Maybe sometime.

Ahhh! Feels good to be back blogging. It’s quite a long time. I have so much to talk about and so many photos to be uploaded, mostly from my tricity trip recently. There’s not that much going on in my life lately, but I still wanna share a thing or two.

It’s been two weeks since I got back in the Philippines. I’ve been all over Thailand, Singapore, and Malaysia for 8 days and now I’m broke as f. But whatevs, I enjoyed my vacation. After all, it’s the memories that count, right? I was supposed to relax upon coming back home because I was so tired from all the airport hassle. I slept most of the time during our flight.

Anyway, as soon as I stepped inside our house, I was bombarded with paper works. Imagine my exhaustion from traveling. My energy level was at negative.

Okay, exhale. I should have warned you on my intro that this is a stressful blog.

The next morning I woke up I had to run so many errands. I haven’t really got a good rest yet. Plus, there was an ongoing renovation in our house. I had to lend a helping hand.

How crazy is this month? A week before my flight I had a short vacay in Negros and when we got back in Cebu I went to see a doctor for a checkup ‘cause my whole body was covered with rashes. I don’t know what was that but I freaked out. It was only a few days away from my trip. The doctor told me I had a possible dengue attack (again). If you know me very well, I hate doctor appointments and hospitals. But when I saw my rashes getting worse, I rushed to the nearest clinic. Thank God I was healed just a day before my flight. I don’t think that was dengue. I was fine after a few days without even taking the other medicines prescribed. And speaking of meds, I am allergic to almost all tablets and capsules. I’m lucky I don’t get sick easily or else I’d die sooner lol.

I talk about so many random things today. I take back what I said earlier that there’s not that much going on in my life lately. I realized that there’s so much happening actually.

Later, my best friends are coming over in our house for a videoke session and maybe a sleepover, too. I badly need to unwind and get myself a good massage. Now I miss the best massage I had in Thailand. I probably will write a separate blog about my tricity trip. Hopefully I can post it before the year ends.

Can’t believe we have a month left for 2018. How’s your year going so far?

How I don’t like rainy season when I used to go to work. But now that I’m just home almost everyday, I’m enjoying the cold weather minus the flood. It makes bingewatching movies more chill. Currently, I’m obsessed with this series on Netflix. Most of the time, I’m into series than a two-hour long movie. I actually rewatched How I Met Your Mother but then AJ has been forcing me to watch Brooklyn 99, so I went for it. He got me at “the humor is the same as Friends” and you know how I looove Friends over any other series/movies.

Anyway, this Brooklyn 99 is about detectives, quite interesting and hilarious. Sometimes I wish I’m one of them. lol.

I’m a little bored with my jobless life so I think I’m going back to the corporate world by September. Also, next week I’m flying to Manila for a long vacation. I have no fixed plans on where to go but I have listed down a couple places to maybe visit while I’m there. I’m going to meet my old friends and relatives, too.

On September, we’re going to Negros for a quick vacation. Then, I have international travels on October to November. I should get a job if I travel this much. December will always be for family since it’s Christmas season. I can’t believe ber month is fast approaching. It seemed like I just bought a 2018 planner and I haven’t even filled out half of it.

Last night, I made some crafty stuff because I couldn’t sleep. I’ll post it on my IG stories tonight. I have too many things to get done but I’m all chill. I have wasted so many unproductive days and didn’t even feel bad for being lazy lately. I just need to relax and unwind before I get all crazy with work again.

8 more days to go and I’ll be reunited with my love once again. I’ll be in Manila for 9 days, just for a little vacation and work. We’re planning to go to Baguio or Tagaytay next weekend maybe. Our original plan was actually a staycation at Tagaytay, but then the place that I wanted to rent is already fully booked. So I suggested going to Baguio instead, though it’s quite far. I have been there twice already, so I’ll show him around.

Today, I woke up a little late, but slept early last night. Tomorrow’s plan is to have dinner with my officemates. I don’t know if we will push through. If we don’t, I’m going to Ayala Cinema and watch Siargao all over again. That is if the mall is open tomorrow, but probably they’re still closed. Sadly, there was a fire incident there last January 5. The whole Metro which is inside Ayala Mall is now burnt. I was actually there when it happened. We were inside the cinema. The movie has just started when a guard came up with a megaphone, requesting all of us to evacuate. We stood up from our seats right away and went to the exit. I thought it was a bomb threat again. We asked the security guards what happened but no one answered us so we did not panic. But when we saw the people running to our way from Metro, we knew something was wrong. The fire started at the floor level with cinema. It broke my heart when I found out about it. Ayala is the closest mall to my heart. It took more than two days to declare that the fire was under control. I salute to all of those firefighters and people who sacrificed their sleep just to make sure no one was harmed during the operation.

This weekend, I think I’m gonna do the laundry again. Why does this seem so endless? I have also already packed up for my flight next week. I’m almost ready to go.

So today is the middle of the week and I am surprisingly productive. Last night, I slept earlier than usual and I woke up at 6 in the morning. Usually, I don’t get up on bed right away. Most of the time, I fall back asleep. But this morning, I felt like my life changed overnight. I’ve been trying so hard since the start of the year to achieve my goal of getting my normal life back. I’m pretty sure I’ve mentioned this for the nth time already in my blog posts. Seriously, whenever I read articles about unhealthy living, I could always relate to the topic. Top of the list is the lack of sleep. Recently, my officemates and I have been slowly practicing leaving the office before 11pm. It’s amazing how 2018 has changed us. I guess we have all finally realized that we’re not getting any younger, and that health is truly a wealth.

Also, I used to have nightmares and weird dreams. I would wake up catching my breath and worrying about random things. They told me it was because of my stress from work. But thankfully lately, I fall asleep relaxed and wake up calm. Anyway, going back to what made me productive today. I opened my work laptop at 7 in the morning and started working (please be proud of me, haven’t done this in a looong time). I also had eaten breakfast again after how many months and drank a glass of milk. I didn’t finish my meal though because I don’t usually eat that much on mornings. At 9 am, I did my laundry while working at the same time. Sun-dried the clothes at around 1 in the afternoon and had my lunch. Wow! I wanted to congratulate myself. Now, I’m yawning every 30 seconds. I gotta hit the sack early. Tomorrow’s gonna be a great day, hopefully!

Oh, I forgot to mention. I had my early morning devotion. I’m sharing you today’s Bible verse.

“Learn to be patient, so that you will please God and be given what he has promised.” – Hebrews 10:36

So it’s Friday, huh. I just shut down my laptop. Yes, I worked until this late ‘cause I was gone from work for a couple of hours and I had to compensate the time I used for dinner and watching Spiderman. I was so sleepy in the office. I knew I needed a long breaktime to regain my energy. I ate so much beef last night. I was craving for shrimps but we couldn’t make it to the movies if AJ let me decide where to eat because shrimps, duuh. I couldn’t stop eating them. And I always pretend I’m never allergic to it. Meanwhile, here I am suffering from itchiness every night for eating all the taboo foods for me.

Anyways, I started watching that KDrama, Strong Woman. AJ’s sister has been forcing me to watch. Lol. I have no copy of the full series yet so I’ve been searching videos of it all over Facebook. I am not really fond of Korean movies, but I’ve watched a few. Now I’m replaying Friends all over again. I don’t know. Never gets old. Their humor amuses me. I’d still laugh at their witty jokes. Most of the time, at their faces. Phoebe is my favorite, and also Ross. Well, I love all the six of them. Sometimes, I’m just biased.

Supposedly, I was looking for HIMYM (How I Met Your Mother), but the HOOQ app doesn’t have it yet. Lately, I’ve been crazy ’bout Netflix, too. So many movies. I sometimes spend a movie marathon with myself.

Yeah, I should sleep now. I’m attending an event tomorrow. Good luck, self!